Reese Olivia Scott was born at 5:55 pm on February 26,
2012. She is what I call our “bonus
baby.” Jeff and I had decided, after
having Ellanor, that our family was complete.
About two years ago though, we both started throwing out the idea of
having another baby. We would talk about
it and then not… talk about it and then not.
But there came a time where we were talking about it more than not and
that was it, we knew there was one more baby waiting to come to our home.
We have been very fortunate not to have a difficult time
making babies. We only had to wait a
couple of months before I found out I was pregnant. We were so excited! I only had two months
left of teaching and new I could get through the “rough” part of my pregnancy
before school got out. I was also
looking forward to taking some time off from being a teacher and was delighted
to stay home with Ellanor this last year before she started Kindergarten the
following year.
As luck would have it, I ended up having a miscarriage a
couple weeks before school got out. I never had one of these before and was
completely devastated.
I knew that we
were supposed to have a baby.
It was
confirmed to me after how quickly we became pregnant that this was supposed to
be. After the miscarriage, I began questioning whether this was really what
Jeff and I should be doing.
For people
that really know me, they know that I’m not one to really be emotional about
things.
When I cry, it really means
something.
Well, I did more crying in
that week than I had probably ever had in my life.
At that point I didn’t know if it was worth
it to try again because I knew I would be absolutely crushed if I was to have
another miscarriage.
It weighed on me.
Jeff was very supportive during this time.
I look back and as much as I was hurting, I know that Jeff was too.
He stayed very strong for me so that I could
be the one to break down. I’m very thankful to him for that. He put no pressure
whatsoever to start trying again and was very in tuned to my feelings.
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Jeff and Lisa at Robbie and Amanda's Wedding |
As time went on, Jeff and I began talking about the
possibility of trying again. I had just had a follow up appointment with by OB and she had said that we could start trying any time
we wanted. Again, I wasn’t so sure. I
wasn’t able to make a decision one way or the other at that point. I decided
that I would just go on living life. I
took on a part time job teaching math at Rincon Vista
Middle School, yep the
same school that I had just quit my sixth grade teaching position. I’m not sure
to this day if I really wanted to do that, but it was a way to keep my mind
busy. Little did I know that my life was going to change yet again.
It was July 4th and we were having a busy morning
getting ready for a family get-together. I had been feeling a little off for a
few days and so I decided to take a pregnancy test, mostly to rule it out. Remember, Jeff and I were still trying to
figure out if getting pregnant was worth hopping on that emotional
roller coaster again. I don’t think either one of us were ready for what that
pregnancy test had to say. We were pregnant, again.
The excitement that came along with finding out about our
last pregnancy was just not there this time. I just sat there looking at these
two lines in utter shock. I can’t even put into words how I felt. Hundreds of different emotions hit me all at
once. For the first trimester I just prayed that things would be fine. There was no excitement; there was no talking
with Jeff at night before we went to bed about how great it’s going to be to
have another baby, just…nothing. As the
pregnancy progressed, I thanked God every day for being sick and feeling
crappy. The crappier I felt, the more reassured I was that everything would be
okay, and it was.
It wasn’t until close to the end of my second trimester that
I remember talking with Jeff and telling him that I was finally starting to get
excited. Finally, I was letting go of the emotions that came along with my
miscarriage and was allowing myself not to worry and to finally feel joy. What a relief that was.
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Hanging out on the couch was the story of my life towards the end. |
It would be lovely to tell you that the rest of my pregnancy
was a piece of cake, but I would be lying.
With it came major headaches and back pain that I would never wish on
anyone. My body was literally falling apart.
I knew for sure that this would be my last baby; my body just could not
take the abuse of carrying another one.
The last month of my
pregnancy was the cherry on top, so-to-speak. At about thirty-six weeks I
started contracting for hours on end. I ended up going to the hospital on two different
occasions with false labor. I thought it was kinda funny as I was signing
discharge papers, and still contracting mind you, that they said to come back
if I was having contractions between 3-5 minutes. These contractions were
irritating and strong enough to take my breath away, but just not strong enough
to make anything happen. At thirty-eight
weeks, I went in yet again, and this time they kept me. It was finally time to
have a baby.
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Please let me stay! |
I love being in labor, it’s my favorite day! Not because of
the pain, and let me tell you, I’ve never been in so much pain in my life
during this labor, but because at the end, I get to hold a sweet new baby.
It’s also the day that everything ends; it’s
the day that I can start to forget how horrible the last nine months have
been.
It’s just a lovely day.
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Happiness |
It's been almost 7 months since Reese has been a part of our family, and let me tell ya, I'm completely in love with that little girl. She fits in perfectly and I can't imagine our family without her. Love you sweet baby Reese!
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Reese 4 months old |